Asserting Independence

A thing which has recently started pinching deep down inside me is the lack of a love life. Nowadays when I go out with friends, I see them giving all their attention to their significant others, and this makes me wish for somebody who would give me attention too, lots of it rather, since I seem to need lots of attention lately but am not able to get it. One of the ways that I try to convince myself that all’s well with my life, is by trying to stay alone, do things alone etc. so that being lonely becomes a part of my life and doesnt feel wierd. I have gone alone for a couple of movies, though it does feel a little stupid, but somehow it does reinforce my belief somewhere that I should get lots of practice of doing everything alone since my friends cannot give me as much attention now as they are mostly busy with the people they are committed to to or busy with people whom they like. I really dont want to burden them with my insecurities especially at this time when they are now growing closer to their potential soulmates, or even burden those friends who are not as lucky and have numbered days left with the person they like, but cannot marry due to social constraints.

I wonder when I would meet a girl with whom I would feel wanted and cared for, somebody whom I would consider the perfect person who can handle a guy like me, all her life and yet not be irritated or frustrated. I wonder if such a person really exists who can handle me, since I cant seem to be able to handle myself.

So the movie to which I went today was ‘Luck’, and as luck would have it the movie was crappy and I didnt even have anybody to joke with during the show as I had chosen to go alone. The movie is totally cliched, those who have watched it would definitely agree that ‘cliched’ is actually the correct word to describe the movie – the overuse of the word ‘luck’ throughout the movie, the army man repeating the phrase ‘koi shaq’ etc. The only saving grace in the movie is Shruti Hasan. The chick cannot act at all, the furniture in my house can give better expressions than she does, however she is definitely hot!


~ by sleepwalker on July 26, 2009.

One Response to “Asserting Independence”

  1. Get married dude!

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